truely happy, truely?

I want to be... I long to me. And at brief moments I swear I can taste it. Some where in here is a creative beautiful being. I lost her somewhere between West Paces Ferry and Lenox Rd. God bring me back. And yet I hate to ask, its a favor I am afraid to take. And I should know better. But Do we really? I am always out side the box. So far I can't even see the box. But I can hear you screaming from here. Get over it. I believe its just a stretch away from old. Did you think that deep? Maybe we can just play in here all day. Someones got to loose fool. Wait.... is this Bipolar? Wait... maybe schizophrenia, no no its depression, or wait! Maybe its awareness, yeah, that's what were calling it these days. Please. I just made myself laugh. Do we really give a sh!t? No. I am going to listen to some old skool NIN. Be good.