I'm not dead, and I'm not for sale.

I am sitting on a park bench by work, over looking a long field of fresh cut green grass. I close my eyes and feel the cool breeze blow through my hair. The sun is beaming down and warming my face and front side of my body. I feel at ease, refreshed, glad to be alive in this moment. I can still see the field of grass in my mind, and a faceless figure standing in the middle, slowly walking toward me. I dont know him but he brings a smile to my face, and its almost as though I recognize that funny walk. As he approches, each step closer my heart is warming. I now see the sun shinning off his dark brown hair. There is a glare from the sun, still not revealing his face but I feel him. His presence is powerful but volunerable. He is also happy to be here. I can tell as he touches my cheek with his soft hand, just gently graising my flush skin. Both of his hands are now tightly placed on each side of my face and my heart is racing. The sun is embracing our every being. The wind ever so softly caresses our exposed skin. He moves closer in and I feel his breath on my face. The soft touch of his lips press firmly to mine. It is bliss, my body tingles, my face gets hotter, my eyes roll back in my head as if to sleep. I then awake to my reality. ..

Have you ever loved someone so much you will wait forever, even until death? Like a knowingness that it really mattered. You'd give anything to see them smile. And when you realize you can no longer make them smile it is time someone else try. The feeling you must let go so that they can be happy. A time to let go for them to be free and feel. When you've exhausted all your efforts to love and be loved. You let go knowing hoping that they are happy, that they are singing in soul. I know one day he will look back, a memory of me will make him smile. Even when I am not present. What really matter was that we shared that moment and I can smile too. I am going to say this one time now to him, to myself, and to anyone reading this, I love you.